I lie awake dying

Cross legged sitting upon the floor
Contemplating my happiness of before
Between my fingers I hold my tomorrow
A bullet with my name
Shaped in the syringe that protrudes from my vein
Memories coagulate spreading their blood on the floor
Visions spinning haphazardly
As the demons sing in latin
Caressing my shoulders as I look in to the fires of blue
Friends cast off like discarded clothes as we bathe in the rivers
A final cleansing before I die
Do you want to die too?
Sit in my shadow and glisten as water heals
As this soul suffers in silence
Lips sewn shut yet I hear the silent screams of my own torment
The things Ive done that you wont
Blister the paint from the walls
Is all that we hold
Is all that we believe
Beautiful?
For the ungodliness remains
Tarnished in the unbeauty that the sunrise begins
For fuck sake turn to the sun and hold the moon in vain
And all I ask of you is to throw the final sod into my grave
As a whisper will show all that is forgiven
Mouthing nothings as the sentences fail to form
Breath the stain from my nostrils
As the its all passed in the blink of an eye